Navigating the Ocean of Grief
By Sarah Brown | June 09, 2026
Grief can be likened to a vast ocean upon which grievers are navigating. Like waves, grief can ebb and flow in unpredictable and surprising patterns. Attempting to avoid grief can postpone the process for a period of time, but grief must be experienced in order to be processed. We can lean in to this process by giving ourselves permission and allowing ourselves to experience grief.
I like to think about grief as a vast ocean. At sea, the weather conditions are ever changing. The water may appear calm one moment, while the next, a storm creates great waves. Grief, like the ocean, can be unpredictable. While on our grief journey, we can experience unexpected grief reactions that surprise us. These reactions can be emotional, physical, cognitive, social, or spiritual. They are fluid in nature and will ebb and flow.
The weather conditions at sea have the potential to overwhelm even the most experienced of sailors. Similarly, grief can feel challenging to navigate, no matter what a person's loss history may be. We are now left with the question: how does a person navigate these waters of grief? While each person has their unique grief reactions, below I share about an idea that could be helpful to any griever. I encourage you to take what resonates and leave what doesn't.
What Happens When We Sail Into the Storm
I'd like to ask you to visualize, for a moment, that you are the captain of a sailboat on a journey across the ocean. You look to the horizon and see dark clouds are beginning to form in the sky. You feel the water begin to become choppy and rock your boat to and fro. You hear thunder rumble in the distance and feel the wind pick up. Your senses are alerting you that you are sailing towards a storm which is brewing up ahead. As you take note of these signs, how are you feeling? What do you have the urge to do? Take a moment to reflect on these questions before reading on.
I'd imagine there may be some fear, hesitation or worry. A sailor may be thinking, "This looks dangerous!" I am going to make an educated guess that many of us would have the urge to avoid sailing into the storm. There will be cases in which the ship has no other option but to sail through the storm while those aboard do their best to navigate the stormy sea. Grief is similar in that it cannot be avoided. We may feel its presence yet not want to experience it. We may not have the time or capacity to grieve right now. While the processing of grief may be postponed, it will be experienced at one point or another.
How to Lean In to Grief: Five Ways to Give Yourself Permission to Grieve
Grief is a natural response to loss. Loss can take many forms, be they death or non-death. Every human being will experience loss in one way or another in their lifetime as it is a part of the process of change. That being said, loss and change are common fears. Denying our losses has an impact on how we grieve. Acknowledging and accepting the reality of a loss can be powerful. Through this we can give ourselves a gift: the opportunity to grieve.
Leaning in to the experience of grief or giving ourselves permission to grieve can take many forms. This can look like:
Having a non-judgemental attitude towards one's own grief.
Be aware that you may experience emotional, physical, social, cognitive, and spiritual grief reactions.
Remembering that there is no right or wrong way to grieve.
No two people grieve the same, and each loss has its own grief process.
Practicing self-compassion.
While we are grieving, we may not have the same capacity to live life in the same ways we do when we are not actively grieving. We may not have the energy or space to do so. Offering ourselves kindness and understanding during this time is key.
Designating time to experience our grief if we struggle to find the time to.
Having a busy schedule with many responsibilities can present a challenge to grievers. Setting aside time to grieve when we can.
Identifying and activating our support system.
Finding safe places or people to share our grief with. Safe people can be family, friends, other grievers, community members, or healthcare professionals.
Finding Support for Your Grief Journey
Grief can be likened to a vast ocean upon which grievers are navigating. Like waves, grief can ebb and flow in unpredictable and surprising patterns. Attempting to avoid grief can postpone the process for a period of time, but grief must be experienced in order to be processed. We can lean in to this process by giving ourselves permission and allowing ourselves to experience grief.
If you are finding that you'd like some support in understanding, coping with, or navigating your grief, you are encouraged to contact Healthy Minds Psychotherapy. To get started, book a brief 15 to 20 minute intake call with our Client Care Navigator through the Healthy Minds Psychotherapy website. Whether this is your first encounter with grief, or you have sailed this ocean before, you are welcomed at Healthy Minds Psychotherapy.
By Sarah Brown