Men's Mental Health: Breaking the Silence, Challenging Myths and Recognizing when to Seek Help
By Katharine De Santos, MA, RP, Founder and Clinical Director, Healthy Minds Psychotherapy
Published October 2026
This article is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional care. If you're in crisis or thinking about suicide, call or text 9-8-8 (Suicide Crisis Helpline) or call 911.
In this article:
Common myths about men's mental health
Signs of depression and anxiety in men
Practical coping strategies for men's mental health
Getting support: therapy for men in Toronto and Ontario
Frequently asked questions
You know the feeling. There's pressure to provide, to perform, to stay steady and never let anything shake you. You push through the irritability and tell yourself it's "just stress," because that's what you were taught and what the world seems to expect. But underneath, you're not sleeping well, you're snapping at the people closest to you, and the idea of saying any of this out loud feels impossible.
Men's mental health has gone undiscussed for generations. Many men grew up learning to be stoic, strong, self-reliant and emotionally contained, and as a result, many put off reaching out for support or never do. The stakes are real. In Canada, suicide rates are about three times higher among men than women (Government of Canada, 2022).
If you're having thoughts of suicide, you don't have to handle this alone. Call or text 9-8-8, any time, day or night.
In this article, we'll look at the myths that keep men from speaking up, why the signs of mental health struggles in men are often easy to miss, and why taking the first step toward support is an act of courage, not weakness.
Common Myths About Men's Mental Health
A lot of what keeps men from getting help comes down to old ideas about what it means to be a man. Stigma is one of the biggest barriers to men seeking therapy (McKenzie et al., 2022), so let's play a quick round of Myth or Truth.
"Real men don't ask for help." Myth. This might be the most damaging myth of all. It treats vulnerability like failure and turns emotional struggle into a personal flaw instead of what it really is, which is part of being human. Admitting you need support takes far more strength than white-knuckling your way through alone.
"I should be able to fix this on my own." Myth. Many men believe they can push through anything with enough willpower. But depression and anxiety aren't about willpower. They involve real changes in how the brain and body work, shaped by biology, life experiences and stress. You wouldn't expect to think your way out of a broken leg either.
"Talking about feelings is a sign of weakness." Myth. This one runs deep. From a young age, many boys hear "toughen up," "stop crying" or "be a man" the moment they show any softness. Those messages stick, and they link having feelings with falling short. But pushing emotions down doesn't make them go away. They often come back as anger, burnout or physical health problems. Being able to name what you feel and say it out loud takes real emotional awareness, and that's a sign of strength.
"Seeking help is one of the bravest things you can do." Truth. Reaching out takes guts. It means sitting with discomfort and trusting someone with parts of yourself you've probably been taught to hide. That's not weakness. It's growth, and it's a commitment to showing up better for the people you care about and for yourself.
If you saw yourself in a few of these myths, you're in good company, and support is available. When you're ready, you can book a free consultation on our website to connect with a therapist who understands what men are up against.
Signs of Depression and Anxiety in Men
Mental health struggles in men often show up in ways that are easy to miss, both for the man going through them and for the people around him.
Physical Signs
Emotional distress often shows up in the body. You might notice ongoing fatigue, tension headaches, stomach problems or muscle pain without a clear physical cause. Sleep is often disrupted, and some men find themselves relying on alcohol to cope or escape (Puddephatt et al., 2022). These symptoms are your body's way of telling you something needs attention. Since physical symptoms can have many causes, it's a good idea to check in with your doctor too. To learn more about how stress shows up in the body, read our post on somatic therapy for anxiety.
Emotional Signs
Many men experience depression as numbness or emptiness rather than obvious sadness. Anxiety can show up as constant irritability, a short fuse or trouble switching off from work. Some men describe feeling disconnected from their lives, going through the motions at work and at home without really feeling present. Over time, holding everything in can wear down closeness in relationships and leave men feeling isolated, and stigma can make it even harder to talk about (McKenzie et al., 2022).
Changes at Work and at Home
Work is often where men first notice something is off. Trouble concentrating, making decisions or staying motivated can all be signs of depression or anxiety. At home, many men pull away from family and friends, lose interest in things they used to enjoy and keep the people they love at arm's length. These changes can strain relationships and create a cycle of isolation that makes it even harder to reach out.
Practical Coping Strategies for Men's Mental Health
Everyone's experience is different, but these evidence-informed strategies may help. They're a starting point, not a replacement for professional support.
1. Start Small: Talk to One Person You Trust
You don't need to have a deep emotional conversation right away. Start by letting someone close to you know you've been feeling off. It could be a partner, a friend or a family member. Often the biggest barrier is simply breaking the silence, and saying the words out loud, even briefly, can ease the sense of isolation. Research also suggests that reducing stigma, including through approaches designed with men in mind, can make it easier for men to open up about mental health (Sweeney et al., 2024).
2. Move Your Body as a Release, Not a Fix
Regular physical activity can help manage stress and improve mood (Mahindru et al., 2023), and some research suggests that combining physical activity with mindfulness may offer added benefits for mental health (Remskar et al., 2024). You don't need to run a marathon. A brisk walk, a workout or a few minutes of stretching can help settle your nervous system. The key is to treat it as self-care, not another demand you're falling short on.
3. Challenge Your Self-Talk
Pay attention to the story you're telling yourself: "I should be handling this better." "Other people have it worse." "I'm weak for feeling this way." These thoughts aren't facts. They're messages absorbed from a culture that doesn't always make room for men's emotional struggles. When you catch one, ask yourself: would I say this to a friend in the same situation? Most of us are far kinder to others than we are to ourselves.
4. Reconnect with Something That Matters
Depression and anxiety often pull us away from the people and activities that keep us going. Make a small, concrete plan to reconnect, whether that's calling an old friend, joining a community group or getting back to a hobby you used to enjoy. Rebuilding those connections can help you feel less alone and remind you there's more to life than the struggle.
These strategies are a starting point. A therapist can help you build an approach that fits your life. Meet our therapists.
Getting Support: Therapy for Men in Toronto and Ontario
Self-help strategies are a valuable first step, but professional support can make a real difference. Many men wait until things reach a breaking point before seeking help, but reaching out earlier can lead to better outcomes.
If you live in Toronto or elsewhere in Ontario, working with a Registered Psychotherapist can give you practical, evidence-informed tools to manage your mental health. At Healthy Minds Psychotherapy, our therapists offer approaches including CBT, DBT, ACT and somatic therapy for men's mental health in person at our Harbord Street office in Toronto and virtually across Ontario.
A first appointment is often simpler than you might expect. It's a chance to talk about what's been going on in a confidential, judgment-free space. There's no pressure to have everything figured out. It's just a conversation with someone who understands the challenges you're facing and can help you find a way forward.
Book a Free 15-Minute Consultation
Frequently Asked Questions About Men's Mental Health
Is it normal for men to feel anxious or depressed?
Yes. Mental health challenges affect people of all genders. In 2022, about 1 in 11 Canadian men aged 15 to 24 met the criteria for depression in the previous year (Stephenson, 2023). What doesn't have to be normal is struggling in silence when effective help is available. Feeling this way doesn't mean you're broken. It means you're human.
How do I know if I need therapy?
If your mood, stress or behaviour is getting in the way of your daily life, whether at work, in your relationships or in your ability to enjoy things, it's worth talking to someone. You don't need to hit rock bottom to benefit from therapy, and reaching out early can help keep things from getting worse.
What type of therapy is best for men?
Different approaches work for different people. Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) is an effective, well-researched approach for anxiety and depression, and many men appreciate that it's practical and goal-oriented. Other approaches, like acceptance and commitment therapy, or dialectal behaviour therapy techniques can also help. One of the most important factors is finding a therapist you feel comfortable being honest with. Explore our services.
Do you offer online therapy in Ontario?
Yes. We offer virtual therapy across Ontario, so you can access support from the privacy of your own home. We also have an affordable therapy program with supervised student therapists who see clients at a lower fee, with sessions starting at $50 per session. To get started, book a free consultation on our website.
What if I'm not ready to talk about everything?
That's completely okay. Therapy moves at your pace, and you don't have to share more than you're comfortable with. A good therapist will meet you where you are and help you build trust over time. Simply showing up and being curious about the process is enough to start.
About the Author
Katharine De Santos, MA, RP, is a Registered Psychotherapist and the Founder and Clinical Director of Healthy Minds Psychotherapy. She has more than 25 years of clinical experience supporting people through trauma, anxiety, depression, grief, fertility challenges and major life transitions.
Her approach is trauma-informed and integrates somatic therapy with talk-based work. This means paying attention to how stress and difficult experiences show up in the body, which can give clients another way to understand what they're carrying and begin working with it. Katharine is also EMDR-trained.
Katharine holds a BA in Psychology from Western University and an MA in Counseling from The George Washington University, and has completed postgraduate training through Johns Hopkins University and The Global Mental Health: Trauma and Recovery Certificate Program through Harvard Medical School.
Learn more about Katharine
Works Cited
Government of Canada. (2022, December 22). Suicide in Canada: Key statistics (infographic). https://www.canada.ca/en/public-health/services/publications/healthy-living/suicide-canada-key-statistics-infographic.html
Mahindru, A., Patil, P., & Agrawal, V. (2023). Role of physical activity on mental health and well-being: A review. Cureus. https://doi.org/10.7759/cureus.33475
McKenzie, S. K., Oliffe, J. L., Black, A., & Collings, S. (2022). Men's experiences of mental illness stigma across the lifespan: A scoping review. American Journal of Men's Health, 16(1), 15579883221074789. https://doi.org/10.1177/15579883221074789
Puddephatt, J.-A., Irizar, P., Jones, A., Gage, S. H., & Goodwin, L. (2022). Associations of common mental disorder with alcohol use in the adult general population: A systematic review and meta-analysis. Addiction, 117(6), 1543–1572. https://doi.org/10.1111/add.15735
Remskar, M., Western, M. J., Osborne, E. L., Maynard, O. M., & Ainsworth, B. (2024). Effects of combining physical activity with mindfulness on mental health and wellbeing: Systematic review of complex interventions. Mental Health and Physical Activity, 26, 100575. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.mhpa.2023.100575
Stephenson, E. (2023, September 22). Mental disorders and access to mental health care. Insights on Canadian Society. Statistics Canada, Catalogue no. 75-006-X. https://www150.statcan.gc.ca/n1/pub/75-006-x/2023001/article/00011-eng.htm
Sweeney, J., O'Donnell, S., Roche, E., White, P. J., Carroll, P., & Richardson, N. (2024). Mental health stigma reduction interventions among men: A systematic review. American Journal of Men's Health, 18(6), 15579883241299353.https://doi.org/10.1177/15579883241299353